What kind of Pause Will You Take On Holiday?
I hope you can take a much-needed holiday pause at this time. A conscious pause is so powerful for our well-being, rest, and creativity.
So, what kind of "Pause" will you take?
Present Pause: Enjoy the moment and have fun.
Reflective Pause: Time for reflection and integration. It could be positive and lead to aha's or negative, and the mind ruminates on stuff.
Empty Well Pause: Feeling empty, drained, lost, sick…
In fact, have you ever noticed how going on holiday often leads to sickness?
Why? For the busy mind/worker, when we finally relax, our bodies often take a hit. During long stretches of overwork or stress, our systems often turn to our short-term generator, our adrenals, to keep us going until we can stop. Alternatively, it runs out of power and eventually stops us, as this is not a sustainable source and is meant for short-term boosts. That was my reality for years in the corporate world—pushing through stress and running on adrenaline, then getting sick on holiday.
The Holiday:
I have just returned from Mexico. This holiday was my first real break with my family in two years, but I had a strict no-work policy with the family. But could I truly relax? Surprisingly, I got sick before the break-even began, stuck in an old mindset of being unable to switch off and feeling ill, which hasn’t happened for years.
So, what kind of pause did I initially take?
I was in the "Empty Well" category, exhausted and feeling lost and uncertain, with nothing to offer—I haven’t posted on Instagram this month! (Ekk).
Yet, I was gentle with myself and also gave myself a mental boost I was reading about José M. Hernández's journey to becoming an astronaut—who, despite 11 rejections—reminded me of the value of perseverance in one's dream and divine timing, i.e. not giving up as his wife said:
"Let NASA disqualify you. Don't disqualify yourself.”
José nearly stopped applying to NASA after his 6th rejection letter. But, after her words, he kept going, following his soul's whisper and dream, where he paused several times and then detoured. He eventually succeeded on his 12th attempt.
But that is not the whole story:
While mental reframing is crucial and a mini-boost, it's not enough. We need to go deeper into the nervous system, which communicates with the brain and decides whether we are safe to relax and keep going. This work is called nervous system regulation; otherwise, it acts as a circuit breaker to grit and resilience, and we will quit.
Nevertheless, to really get to the root and reset, we need to get even more uncomfortable and go further. We need to understand our 'shadow'—the Shadow that provides ‘intel’ and wants to be seen with a new perspective if we are brave enough to listen.
So, despite loving Mexico and being fully present, my body talked to me the whole trip, and I felt slightly sick the whole time. I did pause and, most mornings, took myself through embodied practice, a mix of meditation, movement, exercise, and deeper nervous system regulation work (while dancing in the evenings). Still, my body was telling me I needed to go further, and my dread of returning to the UK felt like a looming cloud, as I felt I had lost all direction and felt numb.
Serendipity & Divine Timing
On my return, I read a Facebook post from a Canadian acquaintance, Sarah, who wrote that she was 'wowed' that after her health markers were going in the wrong direction, she had returned to her devotional practice and shadow work, and after a few weeks, the markers had edged back down to a normal level. I reached out to learn more, but she said she needed to go further. Could we exchange sessions to help? I, of course, said yes!
Ironically, I had helped assess Sarah during her Intuitive Intelligence training and knew how amazingly powerful she was. That was ten months prior, and we had tried to reconnect ever since, but with no joy! We couldn't make the timings work. But on Thursday, things just lined up:
Within three hours, we were in a powerful Zoom session doing the mentoring and shadow work. And boy—what a difference a day can make!
Active Hope!
I share this because I couldn't see the light, and Sarah said she felt like a pebble falling down the hill. Our exchange reminded me that change is possible, even from a deep, empty well.
The truth is that nothing has changed, and everything has changed. We both laughed at how easy it was once we could support each other. But, of course, that's not the whole truth. We both went deep and did some serious work; we had great alchemy, and of course, this is what we do: We hold space and guide people to clarity, empowerment and energy.
We may not have solved everything, but we now have the strength to (metaphorically) pick up the pen and re-apply ourselves. Like Jose, we'll keep going, not disqualify ourselves from the game, and have clearer clarity to our blocks and path forward.
So, whatever 'Pause' you choose, or whether it chooses you, honour it! I do not doubt that you are exactly where you need to be. Just lean into what you need to learn from your 'Pause', as this is how we evolve; the invitation is to re-root and rewire!
So, I invite you to reflect on:
What kind of Pause will you take on your holiday (or staycation)?
What will you do with that awareness to evolve?
Yes, Mexico was a blessing, and I'm so grateful for the pause!
Mexico: From Playa-de-Carmen, to Coba Mayan ruins.
A Neuroscience Lens: A side note on pausing and solving problems:
Great minds like Agatha Christie, Dyson and Einstein illustrate that pausing and taking ‘breaks’ is key to allowing your brain to awaken your imagination and the enlightenment circuits needed to create a breakthrough.
Research on creativity shows that a pause is a critical factor in helping our subconscious to work out problems and create breakthroughs - by allowing the default mode network (DMN) to come online. The DMN is often called the Imagination circuit, and this is an essential step towards that elusive Aha moment. But this is one of three areas that neuroscientists know are used uniquely in a specific sequence by a creative genius like Einstein to reach their aha moments.
How does this work?
Neuroscience shows us that this is your default mode network (DMN), a network of brain regions that come online when we are in flow or not thinking about our problems. However, it has a double-edged sword. When we don’t pay attention to what’s in the subconscious or are lost in fear, this area becomes the ‘demon network’ as it doesn’t use its power to imagine solutions but rather ruminates on fear. Literally, the demon is tormenting you and keeping you from solving anything but reverting back to old solutions or ways of doing things! And there is a good reason for that, too. Reach out if you want to know more.
Wherever you go - enjoy your pause, and let me know what 'your Pause' has to tell you!
I'm rooting for you.
With Moonbeams
Nila
Personal Coach. Guide, Trainer - Create the joy, life and legacy you’re here to create.
Product & Innovation Transformation Coach & Consultant.
If you liked this, get this newsletter straight to your email. Sign up via the Footer. It’s easy!